My Jewish Mother…

January 30, 2006 | 2:40 AM

So I’ve been watching this new Lisa Loeb show on E! and I really like it. I should come clean and say that in high school I had a huge crush on Lisa, and I still love her music. So maybe I’m biased. She had a cooking show, I think, about a year ago, but that was with some guy and now she’s got a show about being single, so I’m guessing that didn’t go so well. This show she’s got now, #1 Single, is all about Lisa. You can really tell that she wants to get married, and her mom puts so much pressure on her. “When are you going to get married? Have you met anybody yet?” It’s like the stereotypical Jewish mother-single daughter relationship.

Anyway, I was talking to my friend Laci last night about the old days (that is, pre-move to New Orleans) and she asked if I was still single. It’s not because she’s interested or anything like that, it’s just a common question for people to ask. (Or it is for people to ask me.) There’s this stigma over single ministers. My first seminary roommate was from Korea, and he said that to be ordained you have to me married. I’ve got a friend who isn’t married (although he’s dated the same girl now for 3 years or so) who is getting ordained. So it happens in America. I’m not going to go so far as to say we’re like the Korean Baptists. But I think sometimes marriage is one of those ministerial prerequisites I wish we could be done with for good. It’s like ordination is my Jewish mother, always asking me if I’ve got a girl back home or telling me there’s a lovely lady over there. Such pressure.

I was driving… I don’t remember where or when exactly, but I think it was one of the three trips from Atlanta to Mobile I took last Fall… when I listened to Paul Matthies’ talk on Single-Mindedness (Part 1). I never got around to part 2, but part 1 was pretty good. Paul, by the way, is at The Village Church in Highlands Village outside of Fort Worth, Texas. In the first talk, he was all about understanding singleness as a gift from God, not as some horrible plague for our sin or something. I can dig that.

In the episode I just watched, Lisa Loeb went to see Rabbi Schmuley (Boteach) and when she revealed she was 37 and had just ended two back to back six year relationships (that’s twelve years of futility, my friends), there was a dead silence. I’m sure it was edited in, but I can feel it. Lisa, I should introduce you to my friend Lu. I think she can help. In the meantime, keep putting out the sweet music, ok? (Oh, and Lisa, if you ever read this, stay in New York, but that guy who told you that on the park bench a couple episodes back seems iffy. I’m just sayin…)